Dear Diane

I hope that one day you will see this entry that I am making this August 14th, 2008 - the day that your Aunt Chris turns 61 years old. I hope you are proud of yourself for what you have done to me. This is an entry that I had hoped that I would not have had to make.

Diane, I had hoped that we would have had a beautiful reunion and the chance to clear up everything that has been bothering you. I want to tell you that Charlie and I had a wonderful reunion. He answered everything I asked of him to my satisfaction. He was willing to listen to me, as was I to him. In four years he will make something out of himself. He remembers the times I would play the guitar for both of you. He remembers the song I used to sing for you both called Paradise, an old Kentucky town in Muhlenberg County that was destroyed by the Peabody Coal Company. Charlie told me that he had the opportunity to go through Muhlenberg County. In fact, he now plays the guitar and can play the song Paradise. He even told me that he was going to minor in Music. That made me feel very good. In fact, Charlie and I exchanged email addresses and MSN Messenger addresses.

I do believe he will do himself proud - and will do me proud as well.

However, he told me why you left Carl D. Perkins; and it all boils down to the fact that you cannot follow the rules of the school. Your rebellion caused your Grandma and Grandpa Littlejohn to turn in their graves! I don't think your Grandma Bracknell would have approved of your actions either! I know for a fact that your Grandma Bracknell did not raise your mother to be rebellious against people.

Your mother has her own things for which she must answer to God. Your Grandma Bracknell is dead and can offer your mother no more advice. Your Grandpa Bracknell is the only living grandparent still alive. I leave it up to him to advise your mother.

I have done nothing but encourage you in all things. I have encouraged you to make something of yourself at Carl D. Perkins; yet, you have a problem with keeping your room cleaned. You have problems with living at a place where there are rules to obey. I can tell you right now you would not have liked it at Florida College. If you had gone there and acted the same way you did at Carl D. Perkins, they would have informed me; and I would have not been pleased with you - just like the Riches weren't pleased with you and your attitude.

It was that attitude that brought you back to your mother; and why? I do not know. In all, you disrespected the Carl D. Perkins Vocational Center, the Riches, your brother, your Grandma and Grandpa Littlejohn, and me. I do not know how your mother is taking all of this, but her actions or inactions will be accounted for in the Great and Terrible Day of Judgment.

I know exactly what you are going through, for I have Attention Deficit Disorder myself. I didn't want to keep my room clean. I didn't want to shave every day. I didn't want to do my homework. I often had to learn the hard way, but I wasn't going to let my self get above 12 demerits. That would have gotten a letter sent home to my parents - and I didn't need a lecture from my mother about obeying the rules of the campus. It's no wonder it took me 10 years to get my Bachelor's degree while many others got theirs in four years.

My plea is that you will somehow find this and desire to get back in touch with me. You have had a piece of your heart missing for many years, and you are rebellious because you don't know why things turned out the way they did. You don't need to be rebellious; you need to calm down, open up your mind and your heart so you can listen to what I have to say to you. You will find that things will go a lot better if you just calm down and do more listening than talking.

Even though Kentucky took my parental rights away, there is a higher law to which we all must answer; and that law says that I am still your father. That law says you have a moral obligation to listen to me while I am still alive. While my parents were still alive, I listened to many things they had to say; and because they are now both dead, it was as if God was telling me, you have learned enough wisdom from your parents - now use that wisdom for your good.

Likewise, your mother and I are still alive. You never get away from the wisdom of your mother and father. The day we die is when the Father in heaven will tell you to use our wisdom for your good.

There are things that you have been told about me that simply are not true; and the rest of this blog will help you wade through the truth and help you to better understand the truth. I don't want to close the door of opportunity on our reconciliation forever, because I believe there is still hope for you, Diane.

I have often prayed for you and wanted you to make yourself a success; but where I am concerned, you must be proactive instead of reactive. Even Charlie told me that you have a good understanding of certain things, only if you will apply yourself - the very same thing my mother told me when she was alive.

I believe that before you move on, you must have the questions answered by me. That is why I am here to help you; but you must take the first step and realize that I mean you no harm.

Or else the door of opportunity may close on you - and you will lose me for good. I am too old and too tired for all this nonsense. I am going to bed shortly, so I must take my leave of you. I hope things are going well for you; and if not, drop me anemail anytime. I will not turn you away, but like the father of the Prodigal Son who waited each day until his son returned to the bosom of his love, so will I wait for you.

I love you, Diane. Save yourself from who you are and come home to Karissa and me.
Dad